Last year in February some nasty pimples invaded my jaw and neck area, making me look like a 14 years old girl who was just stepping into her puberty. After trying tons of creams, expensive lotions and self control meant to reduce the stress level from work and personal life, I decided to visit a dermatologist and follow up a specialized treatment.

Hospital after hospital, one doctor after another, nobody seemed to find a cure for my skin problem which was rapidly transforming into an early stage of depression. I was desperate and I needed help, the lucky girl who never had to deal with the acne in the past was now just a beautiful memory.

April, 2017

Digging deeper into the causes which could have triggered my problem determined me to book an appointment with an endocrinologist (doctor specialized in hormonal disorders). After checking my blood test and observing an abnormal high level of prolactin secreted by my glands, the doctor advised an MRI scan.

Prolactin its a proteine responsible not only with the production of breast milk but also plays an important role in metabolism, regulating the immune system and pancreatic development. Basically…a no go item.

The awful experience of MRI

MRI its an advanced form of radiology used by hospitals to diagnose certain diseases without exposing the body to radiation. At that time the doctor didn’t give me too many details, informing me that its a normal check up in order to remove any suspicions regarding a more serious problem. What problem…I had no idea.

The MRI experience was just awful, traumatizing and not only once I was about to press the panic button that was handed to me by the nurse, before I was left alone in the scary tube. I was fighting claustrophobia, panic attack, low body temperature and cramps being hold in the same position for more than an hour but the thought that I will get my life back made me handle all that with bravery.

“You have a tumor”

After few days the results were ready and as my doctor was gone for her leave, another colleague was delegated to look after the patients. I entered the consultation room pretty confident, being sure that the MRI was a complete lost of time but the doctor announced me otherwise: You have a tumor…were the words that noone wants to hear ever.

More confusing than the diagnostic itself was the doctor attitude who was acting like I was suffering of common flu. I guess I was expecting a little bit more empathy, compassion or maybe an encouragement that everything is going to be ok.

I end up the visit after less than 10 minutes without many explanations from the doctor nor questions from my side, carrying out with me a life sentence: a tumor located next to the brain. I thought my life was over, the fight to regain my confidence was elevated suddenly to another level. I wasn’t fighting for beauty anymore but for my life.

The tumor of pituitary gland its a common disease more often developed by women, characterized by symptoms like: change in menstrual cycles, production of milk breast without being pregnant, gaining weight. I didn’t have any of those. Just a nasty acne which apparently saved my life.

The disease of the sixth chakra

The tumor was quite small and even if it was located near the brain (pituitary gland its associated with the third eye, the sixth chakra when it comes to spirituality and its the hub of hormones in the human body) it was discovered on time and was not putting my life at risk.

The doctor prescribed me a tiny pill once per week hoping that, if everything goes well I can have my health back in two years or so.

Black Wednesdays

Wednesday…the day when my medication would transform me in a moody, tired, emotional, unbearable person experiencing dizziness, migraines and nausea. I would often suffer of insomnia, crying the entire night and thinking to give up on my treatment.

I was in grief for my own self and only few people knew what I was passing through…not even my family (maybe its time for them to find out now). With all the pain and sleepless nights, I continued my daily life normally without any day of sick leave and I even received a recognition for the outstanding attendance at work.

One year later…

After one year into the treatment the doctor suggested another MRI and this time she performed the test using an open machine (no more claustrophobia), well aware of my previous horrific experience.

Everything went well and I couldn’t believe when she shared with me the great unexpected news: the tumor was gone or at least its so small that the MRI cant detect it anymore. However its advisable to continue the medication for few more months in order to prevent any form of recurrence.

Born again

Its my first month since I am being healthy again, embracing the life with more love and positivity than before. I am traveling more, laughing more…valuing every minute of my life.

There are no more black Wednesdays in the week but only days filled with happiness and love. In regards to pimples…its all gone and no scars were left behind to remind me of that period.